Sorry It's Been Awhile

Hello Everyone, I wanted to post a message to you as to why it has been so long since I have posted some artowrk. I found out I was pregnant in August and we were elated! This was my 3rd pregnancy and from the very beginning things didn't seem right. I bled slightly the whole time, which I never did with my other two pregnancies.

Time went on and we got to see our baby on ultrasound. Everything looked good and the baby had a heartbeat of 160 and was moving its arms on the ultrasound at 8 weeks! The following week I started bleeding heavily and knew in my heart something was wrong. I went back to the doctor and on the ultrasound we learned that our baby no longer had a heartbeat.

Needless to say we were devastated. I had to tell my kids which was the hardest thing of all. I was not sure if I wanted to let the miscarriage happen naturally or have a D&C but this past Thursday I woke up and had heavier bleeding and the cramping began. My body knew that my baby died and was trying to do what it needed to do.

I called my doctor and she encouraged me to come to the hospital to have a D&C that night. So I did that Thursday. It was scary to go into an operating room for the first time. But everything went well and I went home that night. I have just been recovering at home on the couch this weekend. I was 10 weeks along and the emotions have hit me today.

I have no appetite and dont feel like doing a damn thing. I am content to just be. Sometimes I want to yell and scream and other times just wail as loud as I can. I can't explain how this feels. I can tell you that my husband has been wonderful in every aspect of the word. Our 5 year anniversary is next week and I am sure it will be a special one for us. He is the best gift I have ever been given. I know with time things will get better, but for today they suck royally. Thanks for listening and wishing me well. I will post again when I feel like being crafty.

Meredith